I deem myself as a shopaholic although not the worst kind, it’s extremely hard to not shop. People say buy what you need and not what you want but to me, I see everything that I want are what I need and there are so many things that I want/need. Whenever I go overseas or shopping trips I would be the one that ended up with the most buys, I try very hard to control myself but the struggle is real.😓
Everything galls me; everything stultifies me; everything nauseates me. I have the distinct feeling that I shall always be unhappy, could become emotionally disturbed and melancholy.
– Franz Kafka
There’s always the thought and urge of running away from this place which should be my safe haven. I NEED and can’t wait to leave this place with these people, they are too unhealthy for my psychological well-being. Times where I find myself breaking down and cry which I don’t know the exact reason why, but little do I know where does the source comes from. There are also times that I found myself changed because there’s so much hate in me and I end up detesting the person I became. I cannot make anyone understand what is happening inside me. I cannot even explain it to myself.
Five years ago, yeah I would probably call it a sanctuary but all things have changed… people have changed. Foreseeing the situation becoming worse after March 2016 and I will be facing it alone. OHHH GODD FUCK THIS SHITTT
P.S I can’t stand it any longer… I really can’t
Some things that I have to do during my holidays before heading to Tokyo:
◉ Tidy my room (sucha chore😩)
◉ Rearrange the shoes rack (tough job, not enough space for my shoes)
◉ Tidy my wardrobe which I’ve done 1/3 of it the last holiday (that’s how much I procrastinate🙄)
◉ Change the travel insurance date for London’s trip
◉ Get London’s itinerary done
◉ Bring out winter clothing to wash
◉ Settle Sister’s to get list
◉ Book mum’s birthday cake or maybe not😒
◉ Work out, work out and work out!
One paper down! So I had my exam today and was dumbfounded the moment I saw the first essay question that holds 25% of the marks, it ended up a disaster as predicted but ayer fuck it; bygones be bygones. The second essay question was okay and the MCQs were fairly easy just hoping I would pass the paper. Left off with assignment submission on Wednesday and it would be holidays officially!
Ohh yeah! Counting down to Tokyo trip with my favourite, officially naming it “The get fat trip” as there is too much things to eat, really too much. Came up with a list of foods/places that we want to eat and having to squeeze more than three or probably four meals a day to fulfil most of them but the list was honestly too much that we had to forego some, nevertheless it’s okay because the more reason for a chance of second trip😂 However, don’t get me wrong the trip is not all just about eating of course there are sightseeing and SHOPPING! Yesyesyes! Disneyland like at last, I have always been wanting to visit Disneyland but didn’t get the opportunity each time and people tell me that the one at Hong Kong is a waste of time, so Tokyo Disneyland please do not disappoint I have high expectations. Another thing that I’m damn looking forward to this trip is buying potteries and tablewares from Kappabashi which the man might have to stop me from buying the whole shop back😅 Still contemplating if I should get a Japanese knife although I don’t think there is anyway of getting it serviced in Singapore so I might still need to do some further research.
About three weeks more to the trip and I’m gonna ditch some weight so that I would not feel as guilty while binge eating during the trip. Planning to do yoga, workout and try to eat as clean possible, I can do it!💪🏻
P.S Finally did some changes to my pages, 4 years ago a tad too childish.
I’ve searched the world for all the right words and my mouth is full of nothing.
– Tahereh Mafi